It is ok to be a Man
Introduction
In the heart of the forest, where ancient trees whisper secrets and shadows dance, lies the tale of Iron John. Originally penned by the Brothers Grimm, this parable has transcended time, resonating with generations. But today, we unshackle it from its rusted chains and breathe new life into its iron-clad veins. As men, we should have an opportunity to explore ourselves and have discussions with other men to grow ourselves and to be better. Robert Bly addresses his perspective in his book about men Iron John. Since this book was written somewhere near or over 30 years ago, I’ll add a few modern thoughts. The idea is we (as men) should not be afraid to be men and we should not be forced to hide ourselves. Inspired by an ongoing conversation with Ron, I am sharing some information and perspective in the light of Iron John revisited.
The Wild Man Revisited
The Original Tale
Iron John is an enigmatic wild man, his body the color of weathered iron, and his hair cascading like a waterfall to his knees. Bound by cords, he awaits liberation, a mysterious figure who challenges the status quo. The status quo of what?
The original German title, Eisenhans, combines “Eisen” (meaning “iron”) and “Hans” (akin to the English name “John”).
- The Prince: Our protagonist, seeking growth and maturity.
- Iron John: A wild man with iron skin, both mysterious and powerful. (helper)
- The prince stumbles upon Iron John’s forest, where a shimmering well guards a golden ball.
- Curiosity piqued, the prince reaches for the ball, but Iron John emerges, demanding an oath of secrecy.
- The prince agrees, and Iron John grants him the golden ball but warns against the well.
- The prince disobeys, drinks from the well, and transforms into a wild man with iron skin.
- Iron John becomes his mentor, teaching him life’s secrets and guiding him toward self-discovery.
- The prince eventually regains his human form, having learned valuable lessons about authenticity, courage, and inner strength.
The Modern Lens
Imagine Iron John now: not merely a captive, but a symbol of suppressed masculinity. His iron skin represents resilience, forged through adversity. His wildness? A rebellion against societal norms. In a world where vulnerability is strength, Iron John emerges as a beacon for authenticity. Authenticity is applied to communities that are highlighted as being in need of allowing for acceptance. If modern men lose touch with themselves and their manhood, it would seem they would require some acceptance. As a man today, we are generally told about all of our negative qualities. We have to hide our emotions and we have to accept what society tells us about ourselves. Many of us have avatars moving about the world while we live underneath the water in the well.
Jungian Depths and Masculine Archetypes
Bly’s Insights
Robert Bly, in his seminal work Iron John: A Book About Men, delved into the mythopoetic realm. He applied Jungian psychology to unravel the tale’s hidden layers. For modern men, Iron John embodies the archetype of the Self—a guide through inner depths. His interactions with the prince mirror our own exploratory journeys.
Zeus Energy and Feminist Age
Bly’s lens refracts light onto masculinity. In an era of feminism, Iron John offers positive images—Zeus energy, not as dominance, but as creative force. He beckons us to reclaim our wildness, not as regression, but as authenticity.
The Father’s World and Ascensionists
Acceptance and Authority
Bly’s wisdom echoes: consciousness raising requires embracing the father’s world. Limitation, sobriety, and authority—paternal values—ground us. Beware the ascensionist, soaring away from the father. Thoreau’s higher consciousness? Noble, but not at the cost of disconnection.
Relevance and Critique
Resurrecting Ancient Power
Through old stories, we resurrect masculine power. Iron John’s wildness isn’t primitive regression; it’s reclamation. We redefine masculinity by honoring both the wild and the wise. How do you get to this ancient power? What does it require? What sacrifices do you make?
Aged Flaws
Re-wilding alone won’t redefine masculinity. We need nuanced conversations, not simplistic escapades. Re-wilding is a term used by Robert Bly in his book Iron John to describe the process of reconnecting men with their innate, primal, and authentic masculinity. Bly argues that modern men have lost touch with their wild nature due to the influence of civilization, industrialization, feminism, and consumerism. He suggests that men need to rediscover their inner wild man, represented by the figure of Iron John, a hairy and mysterious creature who lives in the forest and helps a young boy grow into a mature and confident man. Bly believes that re-wilding can help men overcome their psychological and emotional problems, such as depression, anxiety, addiction, and violence, and restore their vitality, creativity, and courage.
Conclusion
The truth is something much more complicated. In the 1990’s when Bly was addressing a concern about men that was emerging, he was on to something that escaped most of us. Men need other men to shape themselves and become better. Men need depth, dialogue and complexity wrapped in masculinity with the understanding that it is ok to be who we are as men. As with anything else, individual people represent good, bad and gray in their individual behaviors and morality. I know many men who need the love and acceptance beyond the shackles of what is expected as responsibility. It is up to us to make the effort to overcome the norms of society and embrace our wilder selves, our nature and other men.
Remember: We are all Iron John, waiting to be freed.
References:
- Iron John: A Book About Men – Wikipedia
- Book Reviews: Iron John, by Robert Bly (Updated for 2021) – Shortform
- Robert Bly – Wikipedia
1. How does the concept of Iron John and re-wilding apply to the challenges and expectations faced by men in the 21st century?
The application of Iron John’s concept and the process of re-wilding in the 21st century involves viewing the enigmatic wild man as a symbol of suppressed masculinity. In the modern context, Iron John represents resilience forged through adversity, and his wildness becomes a rebellion against societal norms that dictate how men should express themselves. The call to authenticity in a world valuing vulnerability positions Iron John as a beacon for genuine self-expression. The challenges faced by men today, including societal expectations and the need to hide emotions, underscore the relevance of unshackling masculinity and embracing one’s true nature.
2. In the context of modern masculinity, how can the idea of embracing both the wild and the wise be practically implemented, and what are the potential benefits of doing so?
Embracing both the wild and the wise in modern masculinity entails redefining the narrative around suppressed aspects of manhood. Rather than viewing wildness as a primitive regression, it becomes a form of authenticity. The practical implementation involves nuanced conversations about masculinity, acknowledging the complexities and embracing the dualities within each man. By honoring both the wild and the wise, men can navigate societal expectations while staying true to their authentic selves. The benefits lie in fostering a healthier, more resilient masculinity that encourages self-discovery, courage, and inner strength.
3. The blog mentions the need for nuanced conversations and warns against simplistic escapades. What specific nuances or complexities should be considered in the process of redefining masculinity, and how can these be addressed in discussions among men today?
Nuanced conversations in redefining masculinity should address the multifaceted nature of individual experiences. This involves recognizing that each man’s journey is unique, encompassing varied challenges and strengths. Discussions need to delve into the complexities of societal expectations, acknowledging the intersections of factors like culture, upbringing, and personal values. Avoiding simplistic escapades means steering clear of one-size-fits-all solutions and embracing the richness of diverse perspectives. By fostering an environment that values depth, dialogue, and complexity, men can engage in meaningful discussions that contribute to a more inclusive and accepting concept of masculinity in the contemporary world.