21 Days to something better.. It ain’t easy being you.

Be Positive, Work Hard, Success Will Follow

CardonFridge

http://sharetheadvantage.org/

There is a lot of talk about helping people but most of it is bullshit.   Today I want to pass on to you something that was given to me this year.  My friend Frank approached me after one of my blog posts and said.. “Howie, I am here for you to talk.”   Giving someone your time from my perspective is one of the most precious gifts someone can give especially with the busy schedules we have.

At work we don’t have counselors, mental health professionals or people who have time to really sit down and talk with.   We have to be productive citizens that work towards the goals of the job.  For a lot of people who is the reality, there really is no time for depression, anxiety or any other challenge.  There are a lot of people who come to work sick.   Staying home or being sick doesn’t seem to really be an option.   A lot of companies got rid of sick day allowances.  The point is that mental health seems to get lip service but that is about it.

There are two points here:

  1. Happiness is tied to success 
  2. Unhappiness presents cascading challenges which can produce undesired results.

Shawn Achor: The happy secret to better work

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLJsdqxnZb0

What can I do?

Be like Frank.   People don’t want to admit when something is wrong.   A lot of times we don’t even know that something is wrong.  You don’t need a degree and 20 years of psychology to know when someone you are close to is acting different.   The question is what are you going to do about it and how will they react if you do something?  Here is what Frank did.

  • Asked me what was wrong
  • Offered to help
  • Gave me a card (the top picture) now is on my refrigerator.
  • Told me he cared about me and that if I need him that I should call him with no question.

With a small kind act he effectively impacted my life in a very positive way.   I have shared these concepts with my children and we talk about being grateful on a regular basis.  I am reminded everyday as I pass the refrigerator that I should be grateful and health is tied to meditation, exercise, expression and acts of kindness.   I am also reminded that Frank cares about people and he cared about me to share this.  I care about you to share this too.

We can petition the white house for help https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/ but just as the Death Star was turned down because of cost, the government can’t afford to fix mental health.  The money isn’t there.   It is up to us as individuals to help each other one person at a time from person to person.

I am not a qualified mental health professional, I don’t want to get involved

Right…  So what?  It doesn’t matter.   Doing nothing is doing something and with the way people are acting today we need more people to be caring and mindful not just to help others but to help themselves.  It reminds me of the first Spiderman movie where Peter Parker let the criminal go and the after actions of that criminal resulted in a direct blow to Peter.   If you see something is wrong and you do nothing, it may be you that ultimately is the one to pay the price.

If nothing else.. share the image of the card Be Positive, Work Hard, Success Will Follow.

Mental health is a “big rock” issue and the complexities of mental health issues are astronomical in nature.  I am not suggesting that we are going to solve all of the problems with mental health by working harder.   The point here is that as a friend, co-worker, good citizen, neighbor, good person, when you see something that isn’t right there may be something you can do.  In this case Frank shared ideas with me that resonated and I am sharing them with you.   Relating to work and success was his choice and vehicle for communicating his care and concern.

Every conversation will be different and your approach to helping someone will be different.  I am simply saying to do something and not wait until the government or others to help.  If the challenge is too big for you to help with, you will know that right away and you can seek further help and guidance.

2 Comments

  1. Howie…

    This is the second most powerful post I have read since following your blog. I am going to push this to my tumblr blog with you as the source of course. The funny thing is I do these things naturally for others and a lot of times people like us forget to do them for ourselves. You are my brother eternally; thank you for this.

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